POETRY & PASSAGES
The night flows back, the
mighty stillness embraces
and includes me; I can see
the stars again and the
world of starlight. I am
twenty miles or more from
the nearest fellow human,
but instead of loneliness I
feel loveliness. Loveliness
and a quiet exultation.
~ Edward Abbey
She said she usually cried at least
once each day, not because she was
sad, but because the world was so
beautiful and life was so short.
~ Brian Andreas
The mind is its own place
And in itself
Can make heaven of hell
And hell of heaven
~ John Milton
We shall not cease from exploration
And the end of all our exploring
Will be to arrive where we started
And know the place for the first time.
~ T.S. Elliot
Your solitude will be a support and a home for you,
Even in the midst of very unfamiliar circumstances,
And from it you will find all your paths.
~ Rainer Maria Rilke
She was done not fully being herself. She realized she was the only self she could be—and not being unapologetically true to herself was a disservice to her soul and the world.
She was done listening to the noise of the world. She realized the quiet voice of her own soul was the most beautiful sound.
She was done questioning her motives, her intentions, the call of her soul. She realized questions seek answers,
and maybe she already knew the answers.
She was done striving, forcing, pushing through and staying on the hard path.
She realized toughing things out might be a sign to pick another path.
She was done with friends that admonished her to be more light and breezy. She realized they didn’t understand she swam in the deep waters of life, she felt at home in their dark depths and died if she lived on the surface.
She was done with the distractions, the denials, the small addictions that pulled her away from the true desires of her soul.
She realized that strength of character came from focus and commitment.
She was done not following the desires that yelled out in her soul every day. She realized if she did nothing about them,
they died a quiet death that took a piece of her soul with them.
She was done with dinner parties and cocktail hours where conversations skimmed the surface of life.
She realized the beverages created distortion and a temporary happiness that wasn’t real and disappeared in the light of the day.
She was done trying to please everyone. She realized it could never be done.
She was done questioning herself. She realized her heart knew the truth and she needed to follow it.
She was done analyzing all the options, weighing the pros and cons and trying to figure everything out before leaping.
She realized that taking a leap implied not fully seeing where she landed.
She was done battling with herself, trying to change who she knew herself to be.
She realized the world made it hard enough to fully be herself, so why add to the challenge.
She was done worrying, as if worry was the price she had to pay to make it all turn out okay.
She realized worry didn’t need to be part of the process.
She was done apologizing and playing small to make others feel comfortable and fit in.
She realized fitting in was overrated and shining her light made others brave enough to do the same.
She was done with the should’s, ought to’s and have to’s of the world. She realized the only must’s in her life
came from things that beat so strong in her soul, she couldn’t not do them.
She was done with remorse and could have’s. She realized hindsight never applies because circumstances always look different in the rearview mirror and you experience life looking through the front window.
She was done with friendships based on shared history and past experiences. She realized if friends couldn’t grow together,
or were no longer following the same path, it was okay to let them go.
She was done trying to fit in—be part of the popular crowd.
She realized the price she had to pay to be included was too high and betrayed her soul.
She was done not trusting. She realized she had placed her trust in people that were untrustworthy—so
she would start with the person she could trust the most—herself.
She was done being tired. She realized it came from spending her time doing things that didn’t bring her joy or feed her soul.
She was done trying to figure it all out, know the answers, plan everything and see all the possibilities before she began.
She realized life was unfolding and that the detours and unexpected moments were some of the best parts.
She was done needing to be understood by anyone but herself. She realized she was the only person she would spend her whole life with and understanding herself was more important than being understood by others.
She was done looking for love. She realized loving and accepting herself was the best kind of love
and the seed from which all other love started.
She was done fighting, trying to change, and not accepting her body. She realized the body she came into the world with was the only one she had—there were no exchanges or returns—so love and acceptance was the only way.
She was done being tuned in, connected and up-to-date all the time. She realized the news and noise of the world was always there—a cacophony that never slowed or fell quiet and that listening to the silence of her soul was a better station to tune into.
She was done beating herself up and being so hard on herself as if either of these things led to changes or made her feel better.
She realized kindness and compassion towards herself and others accomplished more.
She was done comparing and looking at other people’s lives as a mirror for her own.
She realized holding her own mirror cast her in the best, most beautiful light.
She was done being quiet, unemotional and holding her tongue. She realized her voice and her emotions could be traced back
to her deepest desires and longings. if she only followed their thread.
She was done having to be right. She realized everyone’s truth was relative and personal to themselves,
so the only right that was required was the one that felt true for her.
She was done not feeling at home in the world. She realized she might never feel at home in the world,
but that feeling at home in her soul was enough.
She was done being drained by others—by people who didn’t want to take the time for their own process and saw shortcuts through hers. She realized she could share her experience, but everyone needed to do the work themselves.
She was done thinking she had so much to learn. She realized she already knew so much, if she only listened.
She was done trying to change others or make them see things. She realized she could only lead by example
and whether they saw or followed was up to them.
She was done with the inner critic. She realized its voice was not her own.
She was done racing and being discontent with where she was. She realized the present moment
held all it needed to get her to the next moment. It wasn’t out there—it was right here.
She was done seeing hurt as something to be avoided, foreseen or somehow her fault.
She realized hurt shaped her as much as joy and she needed both to learn and grow.
She was done judging. She realized judging assumed the presence of right and wrong—and that
there was a difference between using information to inform and making someone else wrong.
She was done jumping to conclusions. She realized she only needed to ask.
She was done with regrets. She realized if she had known better she would have done better.
She was done being angry. She realized anger was just a flashlight that showed her what she was most scared of
and once it illuminated what she needed to see, she no longer needed to hold on to it.
She was done being sad. She realized sorrow arose when she betrayed her own soul and made choices that weren’t true to herself.
She was done playing small. She realized if others couldn’t handle her light, it was because they were afraid of their own.
She was done with the facades and the pretending. She realized masks were suffocating and claustrophobic.
She was done with others’ criticism and complaints.
She realized they told her nothing about herself—only informed her of their perspective.
She was done yelling above the noise of the world. She realized living out loud could be done quietly.
She was done needing permission, validation or the authority. She realized she was her own authority.
She was done being something she was not. She realized the purpose of life was to be truly, happily who she was born to be,
and if she paused long enough to remember, she recognized herself.
~ Adrienne Pieroth
Mind is the master power that molds and makes
And man is Mind and evermore he takes
The tool of Thought and, shaping what he wills
Brings forth a thousand joys, a thousand ills.
He thinks in secret, and it comes to pass:
Environment is but his looking glass.
~ James Allen
This one is for you.
For the dream seekers and the rebels, the ones who not only don’t fit into the mold-they f#cking break it as well.
This is for the women who do give a f#ck. We give a f#ck about ourselves, our lives and those that matter most to us—
but mostly we give a f#ck about making a difference in this one amazing life.
We know that we weren’t born to play life small, and while life has tried to smack us down at times,
we stand right back up asking—is that all you’ve got?
This is for the women with the balls to be themselves—unapologetically.
Yes, the balls.
Because having balls isn’t about what’s hanging between the legs of a man—but what we are willing to risk, to go after what we love.
This is for the women who stay up late chasing dreams, and are up early with the sun making them a reality.
This is for those women with thirsty hearts and messy hair—the ones who march to the beat of our hearts
and often find ourselves alone because of our choices.
This one is for you, for me, and for all the women who often wonder if they are alone in their individuality.
You’re not.
And although we are as unique as they come, we all are linked because of the desire to break free from the expectation
that we need to be well-behaved women in order to be loved.
We can’t follow the rules for this life of ours. When given the choice we always choose the most difficult road,
because that is where we often learn the most.
This is for the women who take care of themselves. We are masters at keeping our shit together,
even when it seems we can’t take one more step.
This is for the women who tuck themselves into bed each night. It’s not because we don’t want a lover with us,
but because we know that, unless it’s genuine, solitude is so much sweeter than putting on an act.
This is for the women who just won’t conform no matter how many times people shake their heads at us.
These are the women who drink moonshine underneath the stars with their bare feet dirty,
and their eyes wild dreaming of their next adventure.
The women who prefer to be untamed. We don’t care about letting our crazy show
because we know it’s just as seductive as the pull of our eyes.
This is for all the women who’ve had people ask why we can’t just be like everyone else.
Why can’t we stay in unhappy relationships? Why can’t we just stay with the secure job?
Why can’t we just suck it up because we are adults? That is what adults are supposed to do.
But we were born differently. Where others see stability, we see stifling.
We don’t know how to give up on the desires of our hearts.
And while we may seem to wander aimlessly at times, it’s all part of our un-plan.
Because some are just born to be the movers and shakers in this life—to rattle and shake things up a bit.
And while we may drive you crazy at times, and scare the shit out of you at others, life would be boring without us.
For we are the wild ones—the ones who make life worth living.
~ Author Unknown
Here’s to the Girls with Messy Hair and Thirsty Hearts
We don’t feel apprehensive without makeup
We let our skin breathe
In fact, we would rather be naked
We know our scars and stretch marks define us
And if you throw us a cat call from your car window
Our first instinct is to give you the middle finger
We don’t bleach our hair
Or use machines to tan our skin
We rely on the sun to work its magic on our bodies
We have hobbies
We believe everything we do is an art form
We sing, paint, read and write
We let our fingers callus from our instruments, and then we admire the texture
We embrace our inner ruggedness, and make it appear feminine
We don’t hide indoors from the earthly elements
We embrace them
Letting fire warm our bodies down to our souls
We let the wind dry our hair after soaking in the rain
We jump in puddles
We sit by campfires until the smoke burns our eyes
And we enjoy the smell of our smoke stained clothes
We enjoy smoke. Some of us find it symbolic
We lay under the stars not just to admire the beauty of them
But also to recognize that we are made of them.
We drink whiskey from wine glasses and wine from the bottle
We tell dirty jokes
But we are not prejudiced
Our hearts are not made of gold
But of steel and soil because we are strong and grounded
We wear our hearts on our sleeves
We use metaphors to describe our feelings
And we are damn proud that we feel with such enthusiasm
We are intuitive, borderline psychics
Our libidos and emotions are connected
And when we fall in love, the earth shakes
We don’t allow others to protect us
But when we do, it’s an extraordinary bond
A union with its own definition
If we find one toxic, we cut them out without question
We are empowered by women alike.
~ Morgan Hunt
The birds have dissolved into the sky
And the last remaining clouds have faded away
We sit together the mountain and me
Until only the mountain remains
~ Li Po
And this, our life, exempt from public haunt, finds tongues in trees,
books in the running brooks, sermons in the stones, and good in everything.
~ William Shakespeare
Without bravery, he instructed, they would never be able to realize the vaulting scope of their own capacities. Without bravery, they would never know the world as richly as it longs to be known. Without bravery, their lives would remain small-far smaller than they probably wanted their lives to be…..Do you have the courage?….The treasures that are hidden inside you are hoping you will say yes.”
“And while the paths and outcomes of creative living will vary wildly from person to person, I can guarantee you this: A creative life is an amplified life. It’s a bigger life, a happier life, an expanded life, and a hell of a lot more interesting life. Living in this manner – continually and stubbornly bringing forth the jewels that are hidden within you – is a fine art, in and of itself.”
“I finally realized that my fear was boring….because it was the same thing every day…..my fear had no variety to it, no depth, no substance, no texture….my fear never changed, never delighted, never offered a surprise twist or an unexpected ending. My fear was a song with only one note – only one word actually – and that word was STOP!….my fear always made predictably boring decisions, like a choose-your-own-ending book that always had the same ending: nothingness….my fear was boring because it was identical to everyone else’s fear. I figured out that everyone’s song of fear has exactly the same tedious lyric: STOP, STOP, STOP, STOP!…the volume may vary from person to person, but the song itself never changes, because all of us humans were equipped with the same basic fear package when we were being knitted in our mothers’ wombs…Fear is a deeply ancient instinct…and an evolutionarily vital one…but it ain’t especially smart.
~ Elizabeth Gilbert, Big Magic
To bring attention to a stone, a tree or an animal does not mean to think about it, but simply to perceive it, to hold it in your awareness. You can sense how still it is, and in doing so the same stillness arises within you…You sense how deeply it rests in Being – completely at one with what it is. In realizing this, you too come to a place of rest deep within yourself.
~ Eckhart Tolle
I am an Artist
Driven by Passion
Seized by Obsession
Delighted by Creation
Enthralled with Expression
Entranced by Vision
Diverted by Daydreams
Filled with Emotion
Fueled by Compulsion
Consumed by Beauty
And Blindsided by Inspiration
-Pablo Picasso
You-Shaped Hole
Sometimes the world feels inhospitable.
You feel all the ways that you and it don’t fit.
You see what’s missing, how it all could be different.
You feel as if you weren’t meant for the world, or the world wasn’t meant for you.
As if the world is “the way it is” and your discomfort with it a problem. So you get timid. You get quiet about what you see.
But what if this? What if you are meant
to feel the world is inhospitable, unfriendly, off-track in just the particular ways that you do?
The world has a you-shaped hole in it. It is missing what you see.
It lacks what you know.
And so you were called into being.
To see the gap, to feel the pain of it, and to fill it.
Filling it is speaking what is missing.
Filling it is stepping into the center of the crowd, into a clearing, and saying, here, my friends, is the future.
Filling it is being what is missing, becoming it.
You don’t have to do it all, but you do have to speak it.
You have to tell your slice of the truth.
You do have to walk toward it with your choices, with your own being.
Then allies and energies will come to you like fireflies swirling around a light.
The roughness of the world, the off-track-ness, the folly that you see, these are the most precious gifts you will receive in this lifetime.
They are not here to distance you from the world, but to guide you into your contribution to it.
The world was made with a you-shaped hole in it. In that way you are important.
In that way you are here to make the world.
In that way you are called.
~ Tara Sophia Mohr
She was a storm
Not the kind you run from
The kind you chase.
~ r.h. sin
Let yourself be silently drawn
By the strange pull
Of what you really love.
It will not lead you astray.
~ Rumi
You may write me down in history
With your bitter, twisted lies,
You may trod me in the very dirt
But still, like dust, I’ll rise.
Does my sassiness upset you?
Why are you beset with gloom?
‘Cause I walk like I’ve got oil wells
Pumping in my living room.
Just like moons and like suns,
With the certainty of tides,
Just like hopes springing high,
Still I’ll rise.
Did you want to see me broken?
Bowed head and lowered eyes?
Shoulders falling down like teardrops.
Weakened by my soulful cries.
Does my haughtiness offend you?
Don’t you take it awful hard
‘Cause I laugh like I’ve got gold mines
Diggin’ in my own back yard.
You may shoot me with your words,
You may cut me with your eyes,
You may kill me with your hatefulness,
But still, like air, I’ll rise.
Does my sexiness upset you?
Does it come as a surprise
That I dance like I’ve got diamonds
At the meeting of my thighs?
Out of the huts of history’s shame
I rise
Up from a past that’s rooted in pain
I rise
I’m a black ocean, leaping and wide,
Welling and swelling I bear in the tide.
Leaving behind nights of terror and fear
I rise
Into a daybreak that’s wondrously clear
I rise
Bringing the gifts that my ancestors gave, I am the dream and the hope of the slave.
I rise
I rise
I rise.
~ Maya Angelou
(BIG MAGIC) – I believe that our planet is inhabited not only by animals and plants and bacteria and viruses, but also by ideas. Ideas are a disembodied, energetic life-form. They are completely separate from us, but capable of interacting with us – albeit strangely. Ideas have no material body but they do have consciousness, and they most certainly have will. Ideas are driven by a single impulse: to be made manifest. And the only way an idea can be made manifest in our world is through collaboration with a human partner. It is only through this human’s efforts that an idea can be escorted out of the ether and into the realm of the actual.
Therefore, ideas spend eternity swirling around us, searching for available and willing human partners. …When an idea thinks it has found somebody – say, you – who might be able to bring it into the world, the idea will pay you a visit. It will try to get your attention. Mostly, you will not notice. This is likely because you’re so consumed by your own dramas, anxieties, distractions, insecurities, and duties that you aren’t receptive to inspiration. You might miss the signal because you’re watching TV, or shopping, or brooding over how angry you are at somebody, or pondering your failures and mistakes, or just generally really busy. The idea will try to wave you down (perhaps for a few moments; perhaps for a few months; perhaps even for a few years), but when it finally realizes that you’re oblivious to its message, it will move on to someone else.
But sometimes – rarely, but magnificently – there comes a day when you’re open and relaxed enough to actually receive something. Your defenses might slacken and your anxieties might ease, and then magic can slip through. The idea, sensing your openness, will start to do its work on you. It will send the universal physical and emotional signals of inspiration (the chills up the arms, the hair standing up on the back of the neck, the nervous stomach, the buzzy thoughts, that feeling of falling into love or obsession). The idea will organize coincidences and portents to tumble across your path, to keep your interest keen. You will start to notice all sorts of signs pointing you toward the idea. The idea will wake you up in the middle of the night and distract you from your everyday routine. The idea will not leave you alone until it has your fullest attention.
And then, in a quiet moment, it will ask, “Do you want to work with me?”
At this point you have two options for how to respond.
~ Liz Gilbert
[LOVE WARRIOR] Very young, I looked out at the scary world and decided I was too broken, too different, to risk revealing my true self to it. I felt too weak to survive the pain I knew was the price of love. So I hid.
I explain that addictions are safe little deadly hiding places where sensitive people retreat from love and pain. No one can touch us there, so we feel protected. But since love and pain are the only things that grow us, we start dying as soon as we hide. The cage I built to protect myself from the world’s toxins stole my oxygen. I didn’t know I needed to be seen and known like I needed air.
~ Glennon Doyle Melton
To realize your true nature, you must wait for
the right moment and the right conditions.
When the time comes, you are awakened as if from a dream.
You understand that what you have found is your own
and doesn’t come from anywhere outside.
~ Buddhist Sutra
Become the sky
Take an axe to the prison wall
Escape
Walk out like someone suddenly born into color.
~ Rumi
[THE ALCHEMIST] “Why do we have to listen to our hearts?” the boy asked, when they had made camp that day.
“Because wherever your heart is, that is where you’ll find your treasure.”
“But my heart is agitated,” the boy said. “It has its dreams, it gets emotional, and it becomes passionate over a woman of the desert…
“Well, that’s good. Your heart is alive. Keep listening to what it has to say.”….
“My heart is a traitor,” the boy said to the alchemist, when they had paused to rest the horses. “It doesn’t want me to go on.”
“That makes sense,” the alchemist answered. “Naturally it’s afraid that, in pursuing your dream, you might lose everything you’ve won.”
“Well, then, why should I listen to my heart?”
“Because you will never again be able to keep it quiet. Even if you pretend not to have heard what it tells you, it will always be there inside you, repeating to you what you’re thinking about life and the world.”
“You mean I should listen, even if it’s treasonous?”
“Treason is a blow that comes unexpectedly. If you know your heart well, it will never be able to do that to you. Because you’ll know its dreams and wishes, and will know how to deal with them.”
“You will never be able to escape from your heart. So it’s better to listen to what it has to say. That way you’ll never have to fear an unanticipated blow.”
The boy continued to listen to his heart as they crossed the desert. He came to understand its dodges and tricks, and to accept it as it was. He lost his fear, and forgot about his need to go back to the oasis, because, one afternoon, his heart told him that it was happy. “Even though I complain sometimes,” it said, “it’s because I’m the heart of a person, and people’s hearts are that way. People are afraid to pursue their most important dreams, because they feel they don’t deserve them, or that they’ll be unable to achieve them. We, their hearts, become fearful just thinking of loved ones who go away forever, or of moments that could have been good, but weren’t, or of treasures that might have been found but were forever hidden in the sands. Because, when these things happen, we suffer terribly.”
“My heart is afraid that it will have to suffer,” the boy told the alchemist one night as they looked up at the moonless sky.
“Tell your heart that the fear of suffering is worse than the suffering itself. And that no heart has ever suffered when it goes in search of it’s dreams, because every second of the search is a second’s encounter with God and with eternity.”
…”When I have been truly searching for my treasure, every day has been luminous, because I know that every hour was part of the dream that I would find it. When I have been truly searching for my treasure, I’ve discovered things along the way that I never would have seen had I not had the courage to try things that seemed impossible for a shepherd to achieve.”
So his heart was quiet for an afternoon….
“Everyone on earth has a treasure that awaits him,” his heart said. “We, people’s hearts, seldom say much about those treasures, because people no longer want to go in search of them. We speak of them only to children. Later, we simply let life proceed, in its own direction, toward its own fate. But unfortunately, very few follow the path laid out for them – the path to their personal legends, and to happiness. Most people see the world as a threatening place, and, because they do, the world turns out, indeed, to be a threatening place. So we, their hearts speak more and more softly. We never stop speaking out, but we begin to hope that our words won’t be heard: we don’t want people to suffer because they don’t follow their hearts.”
“Why don’t people’s hearts tell them to continue to follow their dreams?” the boy asked the alchemist.
“Because that’s what makes a heart suffer the most, and hearts don’t like to suffer.”
From then on the boy understood his heart. he asked it please never to stop speaking to him. He asked that, when he wandered far from his dreams, his heart press him and sound the alarm. The boy swore that, every time he heard the alarm, he would heed its message.
~ Paolo Coelho
Hold fast to dreams
For if they die
Life is a broken-winged bird
That cannot fly.
Hold fast to dreams
For when dreams go
Life is a barren field
Frozen with snow.
~ Langston Hughes
[STEERING by STARLIGHT] “We make these hidden blinders of a highly opaque substance: thoughts. Our thoughts are then rendered sticky by emotions, so taking off the blinders can be extremely difficult. Unfortunately, the central premise of all rationalist cultures is that we can think our way out of any problem. This is like trying to put out a fire with kerosene. Our subcultures of therapy and the arts suggest that when thinking doesn’t work, exploring our emotions will. This is like trying to extinguish the kerosene fire with gunpowder. While thoughts and emotions are wonderful parts of an authentic life, they don’t free us from pain; used incorrectly, they intensify it. The way to find your North Star is not to think or feel your way forward but to dissolve the thoughts and feelings that make you miserable. You don’t have to learn your destiny – you already know it; you just have to unlearn the thoughts that blind you to what you know.”
“We can be blinded by many different types of thoughts. Sunny thoughts can hide the stars because they glare so brightly: ‘I’ve got a great job, a cool car, and red-hot monkey lust; now, if I can just get that promotion and put a few more bucks in the bank, I’ll finally feel complete.’ Other thoughts cloud the sky so that no light of any kind, let alone starlight, can get through: ‘I’m trapped. This whole damn world is against me. There’s nothing I can do but lie here and drink.’ No matter what our thoughts, if they obscure our sense of joy and purpose, they’re always inaccurate.”
~ Martha Beck
[BIG MAGIC] “Let other people pigeon-hole you however they need to. And pigeon-hole you they shall, because that’s what people like to do. Actually pigeonholing is something people need to do in order to feel that they have set the chaos of existence into some kind of reassuring order…Thus people will stick you into all sorts of boxes.”
“It doesn’t matter in the least. Let people have their opinions. More than that – let people be in love with their opinions, just as you and I are in love with ours. But never delude yourself into believing that you require someone else’s blessing (or even their comprehension) in order to make your own creative work. And always remember that people’s judgments about you are none of your business.”
“Lastly remember what W.C. Fields had to say on this point: “It ain’t what they call you; it’s what you answer to.”
“Actually, don’t even bother answering.
Just keep doing your thing.”
“If I am allowed to speak my inner truth, then my critics are allowed to speak their inner truths, as well. Fair’s fair. If you dare to create something and put it out there, after all, then it may accidentally stir up a response. That’s the natural order of life: the eternal inhale and exhale of action and reaction. But you are definitely not in charge of the reaction – even when that reaction is flat-out bizarre.”
“Recognizing this reality – that the reaction doesn’t belong to you – is the only sane way to create. If people enjoy what you’ve created, terrific. If people ignore what you’ve created, too bad. If people misunderstand what you’ve created, don’t sweat it. And what if people absolutely hate what you’ve created? What if people attack you with savage vitriol, and insult your intelligence, and malign your motives, and drag your good name through the mud?
Just smile sweetly and suggest – as politely as you possible can – that they go make their own fucking art.
Then stubbornly continue making yours.”
~ Liz Gilbert
After a While
After a while you learn
The subtle difference between
holding a hand and chaining a soul
And you learn that love doesn’t mean leaning
And company doesn’t always mean security.
And you begin to learn
That kisses aren’t contracts
And presents aren’t promises
And you begin to accept your defeats
With your head up and your eyes ahead
With the grace of a woman
Not the grief of a child
And you learn
To build all your roads on today
Because tomorrow’s ground is
Too uncertain for plans
And futures have a way
Of falling down in mid-flight
After a while you learn
That even sunshine burns if you get too much
So you plant your own garden
And decorate your own soul
Instead of waiting
For someone to bring you flowers
And you learn
That you really can endure
That you are really strong
And you really do have worth
And you learn and you learn
With every goodbye you learn.
~ Veronica A. Shoffstall
She had this way
of always finding
the good and
believing in everything
despite all that
she had seen. And
That is what I loved
the most –
the pure magic
of her undying hope.
~ Becca Lee
Come to me
wild and untamed
bring the ocean on your lips,
the mountains on your spine,
I want to explore all the places
you have ever called home
let me pluck each petal
from the gardens you’ve grown
overcrowded seedlings
pushed up through your bones
come to me dipped in the stars
come to me wearing all your scars
I want to show you
just how beautiful you are.
~ Tyler Kent White
[DARING GREATLY] Vulnerability is not weakness, and the uncertainty, risk, and emotional exposure we face every day are not optional. Our only choice is a question of engagement. Our willingness to own and engage with our vulnerability determines the depth of our courage and the clarity of our purpose; the level to which we protect ourselves from being vulnerable is a measure of our fear and disconnection.
When we spend our lives waiting until we’re perfect or bulletproof before we walk into the arena, we ultimately sacrifice relationships and opportunities that may not be recoverable, we squander our precious time, and we turn our backs on our gifts, those unique contributions that only we can make.
Perfect and bulletproof are seductive, but they don’t exist in the human experience. We must walk into the arena, whatever it may be – a new relationship, an important meeting, our creative process, or a difficult family conversation – with courage and the willingness to engage. Rather than sitting on the sidelines and hurling judgment or advice, we must dare to show up and let ourselves be seen. This is vulnerability. This is daring greatly.
~ Brene Brown
The quest for perfection is exhausting and unrelenting. We spend too much precious time and energy managing perceptions and creating carefully edited versions of ourselves to show to the world. As hard as we try, we can’t seem to turn off the tapes that fill our heads with messages like “Never good enough!” and “what will people think?”
*
Why? What fuels this unattainable need to look like we always have it all together? At first glance we might think it’s because we admire perfection, but that’s not the case. We are actually the most attracted to people we consider to be authentic and down to earth. We love people who are “real” – we’re drawn to those who both embrace their imperfections and radiate self acceptance.
*
There is a constant barrage of social expectations that teach us that being imperfect is synonymous with being inadequate. Everywhere we turn there are messages that tell us who, what and how we’re supposed to be. So we learn to hide our struggles and protect ourselves from shame, judgment, criticism and blame by seeking safety in pretending and perfection.
*
Our imperfections are what connect us to each other and to our humanity. Our vulnerabilities are not weaknesses, they are powerful reminders to keep our hearts and minds open to the reality that we’re all in this together. We need our lives back. It’s time to reclaim the gifts of imperfections, the courage to be real, the compassion we need to love ourselves and others, and the connection that gives true purpose and meaning to life. These are the gifts that bring love, laughter, gratitude, empathy and joy into our lives.
~ Brene Brown
I am your constant companion.
I am your greatest helper or your heaviest burden.
I will push you onward or drag you down to failure.
I am completely at your command.
Half the things you do, you might just as well turn over to me,
and I’lll be able to do them quickly and correctly if you just give me guidance.
I am easily managed but you must be firm with me.
Show me exactly what you want done, what you want created,
and I will work on it automatically.
I am the servant of all great men and women,
but, alas, I am also that which brings failure to them as well.
Those who are great, I have made great.
Those who are failures I have made failures.
I am not a machine, but I work with the precision of a fine machine,
plus the intelligence of the smartest person you know.
You may run me for profit or run me for ruin.
It makes no difference to me.
Take me, train me, be firm with me and I will place the world at your feet.
Be easy with me, casual with me, convenient with me,
and I will destroy every dream you have.
Who am I?
You may not believe in magic, but don’t you think it strange,
The amount of matter in our universe, has never slightly changed.
That all which makes your body, was once part of something more,
And every breath you ever breathe, has seen it all before.
There are countless scores of beauty, in all the things that you despise.
It could once have been a shooting star, that now makes up your thighs.
And atoms of forgotten life, who’ve long since ceased to roam,
May now have the great honor, to call your crooked smile their home,
You may not believe in magic, but I thought that you should know,
The makings of your heart were born, fourteen billion years ago.
So next time you feel lonely, when this world makes you feel small,
Just remember that it’s part of you, and you’re part of it all.
~ Erin Hansen
This world is not made of shades of gray. It is made of colors like azure and coral and emerald and marigold.
But it insists on painting everything in black and white and fitting it into boxes that it understands.
Do not do that to yourself. Paint your personality a million different colors.
Leave them scratching their heads,
unsure of how to handle the magic that you are.
~ Nikita Gill
The Exquisite Risk
At any moment, if quiet enough and open enough, we can drop into the fabric of existence in which everything, even pain, has its vivid signature of energy that we call, at different times, truth or beauty or peace. It’s from this ground of being that we know and feel the unseeable web of connection between all life. It is from here that we see more clearly, below the tensions of our wants and disappointments. […] Without knowing and feeling our connection to all life, the patterns of experience seem to make no sense. From within that knowing connection though, we can feel the tug and pull of everything alive. This does not eliminate pain, but distributes its acuteness, the way a net softens the impact of a fall. Without this feeling of connection, we bump through life blindly, startled by the suddenness of things. With it, we can place ourselves in a landscape teeming with meaning, just waiting to be lived into. The exquisite risk is a doorway, that lets us experience the extraordinary in the ordinary. It’s always near. Truth opens it. Love opens it. Humility opens it. And if stubborn, pain will intensify to open it. Sadness can open it, if felt to its center. Silence and time can open it, if we enter them and don’t just watch them.
In the same way that watching the surface of water can be mesmerizing and yet it does not reveal what waits below, the busyness and drama of the world can keep us from going below the surface of the very moments that are ours to enter. In my life, I have known truth and beauty and peace to be ever-present companions that I often sit beside, bemoaning their absence.
~ Mark Nepo
Their words spun like a cyclone, howling through the dark of night.
Promising acceptance, if you gave up all your light,
But block your ears my darling, you are not a brittle stone,
This storm cannot erode you, for you’re more than blood and bone,
You’re deeper than the ocean, both unstoppable and free,
And nothing can control the wild intentions of the sea.
So when they try to shape you, slip like water from their palms,
For wind should know it’s reckless, to disturb the ocean’s calm
You have the right to be here, every right to what you feel
And the wind can howl forever, but the ocean will not kneel
So do not let them change you, send your waves out far and wide
And let them learn the hard way, that you cannot command the tide.
~ Erin Hansen
In today’s culture, where our self worth is tied to our net worth, and we base our worthiness on our level of productivity, spending time doing purposeless activities is rare. It is therefor of utmost importance that we become intentional about cultivating rest and play in our lives, and essential that we let go of exhaustion as a status symbol and productivity as self worth. Play is an inherent biological need. It shapes our brain, helps us foster empathy, helps us navigate socially, helps us deal with difficulties, brings excitement and newness and is at the core of creativity and innovation. In the long run, work does not work without play. It is vital to cultivate stillness in our lives and put a stop to the perpetual action. We can convince ourselves that if we stay busy and keep moving, reality won’t be able to keep up with us. So we stay in front of the truth about how tired and scared and confused and overwhelmed we can sometimes feel. The irony is that the thing that’s actually weighing us down is the very thing we are avoiding.
Face those truths beneath the surface, lean into them, and your anxiety and sense of urgency will disappear.
~ Stuart Brown
Blackbird singing in the dead of night
Take these broken wings and learn to fly
All your life
You were only waiting for this moment to arise.
Blackbird singing in the dead of night
Take these sunken eyes and learn to see
All your life
You were only waiting for this moment to be free
Blackbird fly, blackbird fly
Into the light of the dark black night.
~ John Lennon
She just wants to be
beautiful, she goes
unnoticed, she knows
no limits, she craves
attention, she praises
an image, she prays to be
sculpted by the sculptor
oh she don’t see
the light that’s shining
deeper than the eyes can find it
maybe we have made her blind, so
she tries to cover up the pain
and cut her woes away
‘cause cover girls don’t cry
after their face is made.
But, there’s a hope that’s waiting for you in the dark
you should know you’re beautiful just the way you are
you don’t have to change a thing, the world can change its heart
no scars to your beautiful
we’re stars and we’re beautiful
~ Alessia Cara
Let me tell the tale
of a girl who didn’t stop
who climbed up every mountain
without a pause upon the top.
She’d dance until each blade of grass
was clothed in drops of dew
and the sun knew her by name
but the silver moon did too.
For a fear had settled in her bones;
a fear of sitting still
that if you’re not moving forward
it must mean you never will.
So in time her dance got slower
and she looked at all she’d seen
but found gaps inside the places
that she’d never fully been
for she was a human doing,
human moving, human seeing
but she’d never taken time
to simply be a human being.
~ Erin Hansen
Never trust a mirror
for a mirror always lies
it makes you think that all you’re worth
can be seen from the outside.
Never trust a mirror
it only shows you what’s skin deep
you can’t see how your eyelids flutter
when you’re drifting off to sleep.
It doesn’t show you what the world sees
when you’re only being you
or how your eyes just light up
when you’re loving what you do.
It doesn’t capture when you’re smiling
where no-one else can see
and your reflection cannot tell you
everything you mean to me.
Never trust a mirror
for it only shows your skin
and if you think that it dictates your worth
it’s time you looked within.
~ Erin Hansen